This is the story of how the mythical sage Vyāsa gets “ditched”. The hitherto untranslated Tocharian A fragments 110 and 111 (THT 743 and 744) contain the story of an ill-fated love affair between Vyāsa and a courtesan named Kāśisundarī, which ends with Vyāsa digging a ditch for his beloved and receiving a blow to the head. The text is established through the comparison with the only known parallel text of this narrative: a commentary on Udbhaṭasiddhasvāmin’s Viśeṣastava, of which only the Tibetan translation survives. This paper presents a new edition of the Tocharian fragments, a translation, and a linguistic and philological commentary.